No, he is not a Portuguese Man O' War. We quickly jotted some field notes:
Common Name: Crabby Bill
Latin Name: Cantankerous Robertica
Range and Habitat: north of the border, down Mexico way
Characteristics: beach side patio (watch the seagulls)
Behaviors: enjoys listening to Jimmy Buffett at high volumes in the late afternoon
Diet: (see below)
The only way to start a meal at 4pm is with a good, stiff drink:
We don't remember what the drink was called, or how much it was, which speaks to its potency and deliciousness.
Another marriage made in heaven is raw oysters in 105 degree heat. We're sure these guys were ice cold and refreshing at some point, but by the time we got to the second one they were already medium rare.
Despite this rocky start, between the booze and the bivalves, Crabby Bill was starting to look good enough to eat ;) So, we decided to stay awhile, and boy he didn't make us regret it.
Next we ordered something called "Bang-Bang Shrimp":
These were amazing. They were battered, deep-fried and glazed in a sauce that must have been designed by the good Lord Himself, because OH MY F*CKING GOD WERE THEY TASTY. They can only be described thusly.
Our main course, a soft-shell crab sandwich, was no less a religious experience. Did Noah even have these guys on the Ark? If so, how could he resist dipping them in tartar sauce for 40 days and 40 nights??
Don't feel too bad Mr. Crabby, I'd die here too:
Despite the temptation of Key Lime Pie, we opted for fresh fruit for dessert.
(Happy Halloween!)
In the end, Cantankerous Robertica proved to be a worthy foe and a truly majestic beast. He may appear docile in the wild, but don't try to domesticate him. We played catch-and-release this time, but we'll hunt again, Bill. Oh yes, we will hunt again.
Crabby Bill's Seafood
5100 Gulf Blvd
St Pete Beach
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